French rest stops offer fun challenges. Here's my tip to those looking to win the challenge: Use the handle of the lockless door to balance your hover over the seatless toilet. This allows your one free hand to do all the other work. Afterward treat yourself to a delicious croissant at the quality bakery.
Lons has a one-sentence Wikipedia page. What I can tell you about Lons is that it resembles Ohio, down to the large barn-sized roadhouse bar erected hastily this week to honor Patrick Swayze. But since "The Swayz" never liked the Bitter Tears we did not play the roadhouse. Instead we played the storage unit off of the gravel alley surrounded by mattresses and pallets. Localypso II.
The backstage area reminded me of the back cover of Who's Next (more Who references!). But what it lacked in aesthetics it made up for in hospitality. Home-cooked chicken and lentil curry with coconut milk, a baguette, and some frightening-looking homemade pig pate. What the pate lacked in aesthetics it more than made up for in flavor. I ate half the jar.
...but the planes are not made of paper played their first show ever, a wonderful mix of anthemic rock and expressive French vocals. Everyone in the band had done their homework on us. Over some pate, Maxime the singer hoped we would play "Murdered At the Bar." Frederic offered us the use of his bass amp while Mike's continues to take dumpy poops on stage. This combined with a longing for his girlfriend caused him to cut his hair during the set.
We've been getting encores lately. For some reason. Europe! "Murdered" was trotted out for Esther to class up with her schooled brilliance. We also played "Lightning," one of my personal favorites, and a song I had never played with The Bitter Tears. Thank you, Lons!
Over some more delicious homemade pate (it looked like a 7-layer entrail dip) Alan and I were interviewed for Le Bal Des Vauriens. As you can see our French has improved!
Alex, the promoter, took us to his 19th century cottage outside of Pau, where we could look up and see the stars. I have decided to not make a Patrick Swayze joke here about a star burning out. Even though he never liked The Bitter Tears.
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